You are five now. I feel like each birthday I say this (well, because I do) but HOW HOW HOW did this happen? Five seems so big. School age. This has been a big year for you both and I am loving watching you grow and develop into little people. I really enjoy writing these letters because it allows me to go back and see exactly what has happened in the past year. I am with you every day so I can lose perspective sometimes.
We celebrated your birthday a few weeks ago with a party. This is really your first birthday party that you had an opinion about. I let you choose the guest list and your own cake flavors. Spencer, you picked a chocolate cake with white frosting, strawberries around the side, and blue words that said "Happy Birthday Spencer and Kate, I love you, Amen." Kate, you wanted pumpkin cupcakes with cinnamon cream cheese frosting (that is also my favorite). I was happy to oblige.
Spencer, what a year for you. What a hilarious little boy you are growing into. I often say you are such a charmer! Yesterday, with your little sick eyes, you told me "You are more beautiful than diamonds in the sky." Which makes me laugh. At bed you will say things like "I love you more than chocolate. More than dinosaurs." And then I cry because I think my heart might burst. You have never met a stranger; you have this unique ability to make conversation with anyone - kid or grown up. You are like your Pa in that way - he also can talk to anyone. You love animals of all kinds and I have joked that you are really our "in" for our ministry here in this city. There are more dogs than kids in our neighborhood so you just walk up to anyone and talk to them about their dog. So when I follow you I am also able to talk to them. So thanks for that. :)
You were really into dinosaurs for the first half of your fifth year of life. And by "into" I mean by typical- Spencer fashion, you poured yourself into it. We checked out every book at the library (non-fiction, of course), watched every documentary on Netflix, played with dinosaur toys and figures, read books, had flashcards....When people that love you know you are into something, you tend to get a lot of things associated with that. You are an information magnet - you soak it all in and then basically know more than adults on that topic. This was no different. You are so smart. And then, just as the ocean phase, it started wearing off when there was no new info to be found. You still love the "dinosaur museum" (the natural history museum here) but you love exploring new things as well. Your current interest has to do with sports and wrestling/fighting/ninjas. Anything that involves hitting something. But don't be fooled - you are not aggressive or mean really. You are an incredibly sensitive little boy who still loves his mommy snuggles. That has never changed. And I'm okay with that.
You also learned this year how to write your name and you started school. You go 2 days a week right now and it's been great. You are learning how to socialize outside our family and finding a way to make friends that aren't your sisters (sometimes you have a hard time fitting in with them because they like to play their own way that is usually different than yours...) But Josiah is growing up and changing and your interests are lining up more with his...he is a more suitable wrestling partner today than he was six months ago. In fact, right as I am typing this, you and Josiah are wrestling. Which usually ends up with one of you crying because it went a step too far. Boys. And Ella will wrestle you when you are in the mood and right now she gets you every time which makes you crack up. When you wrestle Daddy you often say, "Is that all you got?" Then Daddy really gets you. You are insanely ticklish - especially under your arms.
You are very excited to have a baby brother, due to arrive in a few weeks. You love to feel him kick and move around and have requested several times for him to sleep in your room. I tried to explain that babies wake a lot during the night and I wouldn't want him to wake you. You said, "But what if he wakes you up?!" So thoughtful. I explained that was part of my job as his mommy. You said you have a lot to teach him.
This year you also had your fifth surgery. It was tough. We were in the hospital for 5 days and your brother and sisters were at Aunt Mimi's house an hour away. You were in pain and your activity was very limited - no running, roughhousing, wrestling, balls....It made you so frustrated. We had to limit your activity as much as possible for 3 months. For a 4 year old boy IT WAS SO HARD. We did the best we could. But as always, you are an incredibly strong kid who is so resilient. God has given me and Daddy so much in you. Every day I look at you and my heart can not help but swell because you are hiliarous, and sweet, and caring. You love big and are very rational. Which I totally get because it's me too. It frustrates you when things don't go according to how they "should." Which some of your siblings march to their own drummer beat....and it makes you crazy. You start kindergarten in August this year and you are ready and excited. I love being your mommy. Gosh, I love it.
Kate. Oh my sweet girl, how do I start with you? First of all, you are like my little carbon coby. It's frustrating and hilarious all at the same time. You have a temper of a firecracker and laugh at yourself for the smallest reasons. Man, is that me!!! You are a sweet little girl who likes for everyone else to follow the rules and you like to be the one to remind them when they step out of line. But you would rather do what you want to do when you want to do it. Power struggle, hello!
You also are very girly! You change your clothes approximately 10 times a day and you love Barbies, my little ponies, coloring, drawing, and you are bound and determined to learn to read. Which you ask me to teach you at 8 pm at night when we are getting ready for bed! And I have to say, "Um, I can not teach you to read at bedtime. But we can read this book together." You love, love, love Ella. Oh gosh. You want everything she has. Which usually involves you yelling at her and she has grown into such a patient sister with you when you start throwing a fit because the one Barbie dress she has and you must have at this moment just because she has it. You all still sometimes play "Ella" which means she gets to be the mom and you are Ella and wear her clothes. It is so sweet to watch you two together.
Gosh, I love you. You are a piece of myself walking around in this world. It is painful and exhiliarting to watch. Because when you start yelling in frustration, I so get it. You have learned you are to yell into your pillow and I think you feel empowered that you have a safe place to yell when you just have to get it out. I love how you say "Excuse me," to grown ups when you want to tell them something. I also find it hilarious a few weeks ago I went to pick you up from preschool and I was informed you told everyone to call you Kathleen. When I had never heard that request from you before. But later on you said I could still call you Kate if I wanted. You have informed me you want lots of kids, some to come from your belly and some to come from countries. I find it encouraging that you are still part of a big family and you still want a big family. I hope it's always that way. :)
Your coloring skills and letter writing has gone from basically nothing to awesome in a year! You love playing tic-tac-toe and playing half of a board game. Haha! You are funny and smart and creative and spirited and passionate and sensitive.
I can't believe you are 5. I can't believe I am sending you to kindergarten in six months. I can't believe how much God has taught me through your lives. It is humbling and messy and beautiful and I get it wrong so often. But yet, He has given both of you these sweet and gracious hearts that forgive me over and over. It reflects Jesus to me in ways I pray you will understand years down the road. I love you.
Happy Birthday.
Mama
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